Memories and the making of them

So you all know about my Dad AKA Grumpy, well he continues to go through the journey that is Alzheimer’s and the progress within this cruel and unforgiving disease (yes a disease not a normal part of ageing). So as a family we are now realising the importance of making memories and today was one of the days that my niece managed to make one and video the evidence for us.  She captured her daughter and us all a memory that previously his grandchildren have and now great grandchildren may still have time to make. So it was great to see a video of Dad with his great granddaughter stood on his wheelchair has he drives it into the house. He actually looked like he used to be and do you know what it made me think we need to grab those memories and just store them to share with those that come after us or are to young to remember. So log it and keep it, enjoy looking back, value who your person is and don’t just see the condition. Remember they are who they were just a little buried under all the chaos that is Alzheimer’s. Its a short blog today but honestly it is so important to remember and save those moments and love them. Just take a moment and sit back and remember the person in front of you. SEE THEM!30922044_10157320885744622_2107416334_o

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Attention to Care the Aim

Morning everyone, another week in the life of Attention to Care.  After posting about recruitment and retention of staff within care I decided to just write a little more about Attention to Care and what my aim is.

Attention to care as I mentioned in previous post is my own company which is not LTD at this point in time I am just a sole trader. I set it up as I lost a little faith in being employed by others. I felt I lacked control in my life and I was losing who I was, which then meant I lost a little of what I was aiming to achieve. Care has been my life since I was 16 I went to college and did a qualification called Preliminary Certificate in Social Care. It was a good course that then gained me a job within Cambridgeshire Mencap where I worked on and off for 23 years. I then as previously explained went on to Assessing and training. I felt the needed to try and give others the opportunity to learn and develop to then progress. (sorry digressing)

I worked for a number of years with 2 large training providers and learnt a lot but also learnt that there is a push for bums on seats not on quality. Sadly this is true and the fact that we talk about individual learning as far as my experience was there was not individual learning just generic. I ended up having a full break for 6 months and then went to a college (not the best decision) realising that it was really not for me I need a new challenge so luckily I kept in touch with a colleague (friend) and he got me some freelance work as an assessor. 2 years later still dabble in assessing have now about 9 learners. However, my main goal is to build the training in house at care companies which I am loving. I can show my passion and be honest with people about care and all its wonderful colours and sounds.

Attention to Care was set up last year and the aim of Attention to Care is to train in care companies but also to use Facebook to promote care in general. To give care a face, a visibility, a value. I do not wear rose coloured spectacles I know the reality within care and know when things go wrong they can go gravely wrong. However, I know how great care can be across all companies. I can meet people who are amazing, who value people who promote fully the 6 C’s (care, compassion, commitment, courage, communication and competency) people that wants to make some difference whether that is leaving a person with a smile after they have supported them or supported someone to be independent.

So if we commence sharing the good stories and valuing the care staff and management then I am sure we can commencing fixing a system that seems a little broken at the moment. If I can be part of that fix then the aim of Attention to Care will have been fulfilled. Its not a lot to ask that we look at care and what people do on a daily basis to support our most vulnerable in society. If we look at the value it has for those that are being cared for then we can see how vital it is to do something to make it what it needs to be. Care needs to have a value, it needs to be about a career choice it needs to be a first choice in options for our children (not a throw away subject).

So the more I spout off , communicate and just generally speak up then hopefully someone will read and help me with the aim then share and like. That’s the aim to show care as something worthwhile.

So if like a soap box, bandwagon or just generally like sound of own voice (Like me) then please read, like, comment and share. Join a community to value care.

 

January is Over

Well what has January done for us lately? Well, business was good and looks like its taking us into February positively.

However, Grumpy saga’s still continue (reminder grumpy is my father) he has had 3 admissions to the hospital and another 3 discharge letters that are unhelpful, not clear and sadly the last one not factual. How is it someone goes into hospital for one thing and comes out with something else and really not seeming any better well in fact potentially worse? With the discharge letter leaving out vital information for the GP.

This time for my mother the experiene was distressing with a Doctor shouting at her and a Nurse (head nurse I believe) being rude, snappy and unhelful to my mother unless oddly if others were there. With the lack of understanding within Dementia and the need for my mother to be there to help so as my father does not get distressed. I don’t understand this and I clearly did not see any understanding of his needs both physically and emotionally.  What fustrates me is we have completed a THIS IS ME write up to tell them about how he is, his history, his needs, his capabilities but I am not even sure they bothered reading it.

Of course on looking at the CQC report I am not surprised the hospital is inadequate and the fact that it took me to tell them to place a fluid chart in place before they did.

So why am I writing this and not naming and shaming well thats because my mother would not like that as she is very much appreciative of the NHS and of the hard work some do but also there is no point as it seems not even CQC have responded to a complaint  I put in. I am therefore writing it for me. I am writing to just show that we need to try to speak up get a voice and say no to poor practice, poor empathy from people who should know better. I am writing because I want to know when Grumpy has to go back in that I know he is having the best care they can possibly give and that they consider my mother and emotional wellbeing.
What this hospital lack or at least now 2 of the 3 wards my father was on are the 6c’s which are:

Care

Compassion

Competence

Courage

Communication

Comittment 

These a key principles not hard, nothing you need to be taught really, things that we should expect and things I remind people of when I do in house training.

So where are we now with grumpy, well he is home. mother is managing and is doing as always and amazing job. Best put that she would do better if the council came and got a bed that has been stood in her garden for nearly 2 months. 

Mother his helped by some (what should I call?)  gentle jibes through the facebook group Grumpy’s groupies. It have got worse by the way with the content to bad that I can not screenshot much of it. This group continues to do its job of light relief and offloading. Its important to know when you need to be serious and when you can just show how nuts you are as that is what this group is about. ‘Its not all about Grumpy’. It has to be about our mum, our grandma it has to be to ensure she is kept up beat in times of adversity.

So bravely I share some of the content.

As you can see its so wrong but for my mother it is so right its her place and she gains so much as do we. Try it. Caring is hard butcan be made easier with the right support and right dose of nuttiness.

 

Hey feel free to share you groups. Smiling and laughing is important. Take care of each other, speak up and be the persons voice and know your rights.

Untitled

Untitled today is about not being able to put my finger on what I wish to share but knowing I need to at least try.  I think I have lost the the WHY for this site and so I am in the process of deciding. Until then  I may not have a lot to post to share.

I could share the trials of my mother and father which have been interesting but is that what my blog was for? Or do I need to re-vamp altogether if so what do I want to gain from the blogging? I don’t want to continue to feel that my blog is untitled but at present it is and I now need to decide.

These are my ideas:

Blog soley about care and what experiences I have and other have.

Blog for resource sharing?

Blog that incoropates the journey we are going to go on with my father (AKA Grumpy)/

Blog to look at training and assessing within care.

 

Or do I make it a mixture and do something like a month on each?

Also I need to find out my WHY!

 

What’s next, What can I do?

Today I am sat at home, waiting  to do some one to one session with learners (working from home), had appointments booked in but sadly not one completed at the moment and its gone 12:00 (tick tock). However, I have had an interesting call about a new idea for a support site and I am now questioning what I want to do next.

Don’t get me wrong assessing in general is a good job and it fits with my life but like today, I have not had a session completed, sadly people not picking up the phone, no work to mark so in some sense it becomes hard to ensure someone’s learning journey is consistent and meaningful. Commitment sometimes is lacking or schedules change in care and people just don’t let me know.

So I am now sat here thinking (cogs turning, head full).

My ultimate goal was to go into more training, motivational sessions to get people to buy into the care and how to be the best. I wanted to get a community talking about care but not sure how.

I see the best but some times not the so good (poor practice and care). I set up my Facebook page and this blog to try to get a community talking and sharing their stories but to be honest its not working. Have less then 100 likes on FB page which if you consider the amount of people in care that’s just nothing. Followers on word-press I have 21. Is this because I don’t use profanities, I do a blow by blow log of my day, is it because people just don’t talk about care or is it people in care just don’t have the time.

So where am I going wrong? What do I need to do?  Where do I go from here?

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Time and committment

What can I say I’ve neglected my blog, just seems less time to think and write. However, have been to Scotland and then to my very first festival. Also lots of work in the garden at weekends but clearly not in my 20’s or even 30’s for that matter as I ache.

So Scotland was amazing, beautiful as always I love it. One day we will be moving to Scotland but for now its enough to visit just wish time would allow us more visits.

The festival not even sure what to say, I last 45 years not going to a festival and then I went. Well it was great fun but camping is not for me. Embrace were fabulous and it was a nice surprise meeting the stars of Emmerdale. Paddy we loved him.

Then the gardening well lets just say we have done wonders and we still have more to do, lots of trips to the tip.

Save the dates have nearly all gone out. Wedding 2017!

Now to work well Assessing is good, my contact with some lovely learners make it easier to do my job. As usual paperwork and politics always have a negative baring on how much you enjoy your role. Still for me if I can impart one piece of information to enable someone to do their job better and then ultimately the care should be better.

No I am going to set myself a task that by the end of the year I will have completed a well being week. I want to do this and was suppose to do it in August but time and other commitments placed it on a back burner. What I ask myself is why did I not find the time? I placed well-being second and I need to address the balance.

So I will do and I will ask for stories to be shared regarding well being and mental health. Trying to lift the darkness on being able to talk about suicide is my aim.

So until then hope all are well and those carers out there are keeping themselves well.

Love long love strong and hold tight things sometimes will seem unbearable but please talk, chat, open up, share and most of all if your a person who is been told ‘LISTEN’

Its who you bump into sometimes!

Well its been a month and a half since I gave up college assessing (it just wasn’t for me), Even though still feel somewhat nervous and anxious, I am now starting to feel motivated. Yes motivated and its not bad. Yes my little monster in my ear still tries to bring me back into a less motivated space or tries to pass on the CBA function. I AM NOT LISTENING!!!!

Anyway I digress… well yes motivation is back and that was helped when I bumped into a manager of one of the very first domiciliary care agencies I assessed in. Well it was a quick catch up (gossip). However, after the brief catch up we went on to talk about care and the impact of double up rounds on the ‘purse strings’. Now we all know cuts are happening (disgraceful cuts) but there is nothing we can do so we have to be seen to still trying out very very best to meet the needs of each person. So double up rounds (2 carers) are being looked at to see if there are ways that one carer can do the same as 2 (calm down no need to shout). There are ways but this means equipment and I mean the very best equipment out there that cost money and that will be a big outlay to begin with however, in the end it would save money but also in some cases provide a better care experience. We need the care providers on board with this but so many see the £ signs for double up and do not want to budge. However, luckily I assess in one place that are open to looking at the change and to look at what this means to the people they support. Never, in any legislation does it state 2 carers must hoist yet care companies work on the proviso which is incorrect. What it does say is safe use, meeting the needs, assessing the risk and adapting to ensure correct equipment.

So come on lets look at this and lets see how it will help, so if your a person out their that is caring for the loved ones and they need hoisting work with the providers to look at the systems in place. If you a carer be open minded to listen and to try. For carers who are unpaid maybe the new pieces of equipment out there will be better. Please check out this research and also the equipment.

http://www.independentliving.co.uk/moving-handling-it-takes-two/

I am lucky enough now to be able to go to an awareness session to understand more about using equipment suitable for one carer to do. I am open minded regarding if it works and how it will benefit. I feel at times people are sat waiting for 2 carers to turn up (I witness this at one care company and it was very distressing to see a lady desperate to use the facilities and couldn’t as other carer hadn’t turned up). Also the amount of times I have had to tell people to not talk over a person to each other about their own bloody lives. So if this stops that then surely its worth a go. SAFELY, RESPECTFULLY and INCLUSIVELY .

Working together will help and will ensure the BEST OUTCOME BASED CARE

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Care and what does is mean?

Care Definition:

The provision of what is necessary for the health, welfare, maintenance, and protection of someone or something:the care of the elderly, the child is in the care of her grandparents healthcare

 

For me care is about enabling, supporting, reassuring and protecting people. I know there are lots of amazing carers out there who do a tireless job (some not even seeing it as a job).

My mother cares for my father she puts all her energy and love into ensuring they have a good life together enabling and supporting him to enjoy every aspect of life by making their time together full of experiences.She values every moment she has and never ever looks back.

I have 2 friends who care for their boys who have difficulties and do it with warm hearts and open minds, not expecting the world to see them  but I see them both, their time is filled with caring for these boys who need their full attention but never do they regret being there for them or regret having them just as they are.

Me well my job was to care, within the care sector supporting individuals with Learning disabilities to fulfil what they needed or wanted within their lives, not always positive moments (at times a little shocking) but mainly moments that will stay with me, moments of achievement and rewards, moments of sadness and joy, moments that would make your hair curl but never ever did I regret my choice of career. I actually used to love my job even though it was full on and there was a lot of battles that I tried to fight on their behalf (some we won as a team).  What I worry about is that now in the job I do I don’t see many people who have the same ethos or compassion about supporting people out there who are vulnerable, yes there are some who are out there who love their job and doing amazingly but surely this should not be a few it should be most.

So I ask you what is care to you and how can we nurture new carers to give the BEST they can to people who need our BEST. Is it about qualification as I don’t think it is.

 

Back to the basics of Talking about care

Care is not a cool subject to discuss it seems, in the public eye or in their ears as they seem to just hear about the poor care that goes on out there. I am aware that some care homes are not up to standards and some employers have a lot to learn but the on the ground level carers who chose to do this job are being devalued.

We have to see social care as important as clinical care. Just because the care workers or carers may not have a degree or doctorate or a nursing qualification does not mean they are less important or valuable. Until the government value the work people do care will always have bad press or be seen as a job people fall into (I remember someone saying anyone can do OMG no not true) . I get that people think its a job that fits please do not go into care work because it just fits. We need compassion, passion, confidence, nurturing and empathy attributes to enable the people that are vulnerable to be supported in everyday life, whether that is at the start of life or and the end of life.

I have had the honour of supporting people within care, some at the start of finding their independence and others at the most vulnerable times of their life’s. I look back and some of the things we changed over the years to ensure the people we supported had a voice is remarkable and I believe continues in many care providers (we just don’t sing our own praises).

Many of these carers, care workers are getting minimum pay to care for all our loved ones or to care for us in the future. I ask you what price can be put on that. There has to be some sliding scale and in care there must be a different minimum wage surely.

I have just seen a post on another site I am a member of and its made me think about the lonely world at time when you are caring for a family member and how isolating it can be. I hope this lady does not mind but she noted in her post that she felt invisible within her life and that she is ‘just a carer’. I would like to say ‘just a carer’ is really not a title I like, the just bit is an injustice and I am telling you out there that anyone who is a carer the word just should never be used ahead of the word. You are a carer which I would title as a very important person who enables, encourages, guides, supports, loves, cares, fights, communicates and stands out in a crowd for the person you care for. A lot of the time you are selfless and forget about you so I am telling you in a very nice tone, we do not forget you, we see you and we hear you. Never ever feel isolated or invisible as we are grateful for the work you tirelessly do and at times it must be terrifying of what your day will bring but all I can say is hold on to your strength that you most certainly have and remember you will get through this and there will be the light and the hope.

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Squirrel Watch

Morning of 20/07/15 I find myself obsessing over a little creature that I found in the trees behind my house yesterday. I was lucky enough that he/she decided to come back and visit yesterday evening.  So what do I find myself doing this morning instead of getting my 10 year old ready for school? I find myself sat with coffee in hand at my back window staring out at the said trees for any glimpse of he/she visiting again.

Yesterday I even sent an email to The Red Squirrel Survival Trust asking them to verify if the said squirrel is a red one. Oh what has my life come to that I take more time on Squirrel Watch then I do checking that 10 year old has boxers, matching socks on.

Pictures of yesterday evening watch  in case you are as obsessed as me and can’t start your day with out a squirrel fix.P1090241 (2) P1090246 (2) P1090259 (2) P1090275 (2) P1090278 (2)

Update at 08:07 no sighting today as yet. I have to tell myself to work today and not look out of the window with camera in hand. 

09:13 spotted the little mite but not quick enough with camera, now must move away and do some work, not sure squirrel watch is a valid excuse to take time off.